It's not unusual to have concerns about the impact money may have on your children's lifestyles. Even beyond basic financial responsibility, you want to make sure that wealth does not remove your children's incentives to work hard, to pursue meaningful careers, or to care about other people. How do you help your children obtain the values you'd like them to have? Consider these tips:
- Lead by example. Of course, you want to have many discussions with your children about the values you consider important, including the value of hard work, caring bout others, and preserving their legacy. But it is equally important to ensure that your behavior supports these values, since children watch their parents' actions closely. Make sure your handling of spending, debt, asset purchases, investments, and charitable donations support the behavior you are trying to instill in your children.
- Teach financial basics. Encourage your children to take finance courses in high school and college that help explain the basics of investments and personal finance. Include your children in discussions about significant financial decisions, such as which investments to select, which charitable organizations to support, and which major assets to purchase.
- Allow your children to make their own financial decisions. Don't just give them money every time they want to make a purchase. Give your children an allowance that increases as they get older to cover certain expenses, such as entertainment, lunches, clothing, and gasoline for their car. Let them learn how to spend the money, but don't give them extra money if they make bad choices. It is important for your children to learn from their mistakes. You can discuss options with them, but the final decisions should be theirs.
- Counsel your children on continuing your financial legacy. You should have plans in place to ensure your financial legacy lasts for an extended period of time. That could include setting up trusts that will distribute funds to your children gradually, such as in thirds when each child reaches age 25, 30, and 35. Or, you may want to structure distributions to promote behavior that is important to you. Once your plans are in place, explain them in detail to your children so they understand what you are trying to accomplish.